Broken and Grateful

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My friend Kent and I were exchanging edifications this morning about "deconstruction." You know, what God allows into our lives with the aim of taking away what He doesn't want in us before He begins building that which He would like in us.

Some people would like to think that this deconstruction is not a valid concept, that it's not meant for their lives if they're walking rightly with God. But in my humble opinion, I don't think that's true.

The apostle Paul went through it, after all. He needed God, like we do, to remind him of Who was both Creator and Father to him. We, like him, need God to allow us to get into a circumstance that will push us beyond what we think we are capable of so that we may discover what He is capable of when we truly surrender our lives to Him.

For we do not want you to be uninformed, brethren, about the affliction and oppressing distress which befell us in [the province of] Asia, how we were so utterly and unbearably weighed down and crushed that we despaired even of life [itself].
Indeed, we felt within ourselves that we had received the [very] sentence of death, but that was to keep us from trusting in and depending on ourselves instead of on God Who raises the dead.
[For it is He] Who rescued and saved us from such a perilous death, and He will still rescue and save us; in and on Him we have set our hope (our joyful and confident expectation) that He will again deliver us [from danger and destruction and [a]draw us to Himself]...

2 Corinthians 1:8-10

It's as though God is peeling away our layers like an onion, trying to get to something He's placed within each of us and is precious to him. It's a loving process, mind you. He is ever close and gentle as we learn.

So, deconstruct, Lord. Peel, Father. Help us to get down to that which You first placed within us when we said "I believe and I will follow."

In her song "What I Thought I Wanted," Sara Groves so eloquently (as she often does) sings of this constant process in our lives of faith. In some seasons pronounced, in other seasons subtle. But always, He is there and working within us. Please read these lyrics and ponder the wonder of His care for us all. (Click on the "Read More!" link below)

"What I Thought I Wanted"

Tuxedo in the closet, gold band in a box
Two days from the altar she went and called the whole thing off
What he thought he wanted, what he got instead
Leaves him broken and grateful

I passed understanding a long, long time ago
And the simple home of systems and answers we all know
What I thought I wanted, what I got instead
Leaves me broken and somehow peaceful

I keep wanting you to be fair
But that’s not what you said
I want certain answers to these prayers
But that’s not what you said

When I get to heaven I’m gonna go find Job
I want to ask a few hard questions, I want to know what he knows
About what it is he wanted and what he got instead
How to be broken and faithful

What I thought I wanted
What I thought I wanted
What I thought I wanted
What I thought I wanted

Staring in the water like Esops foolish dog
I can’t help but reflect on what it was I almost lost
What it was I wanted, what I got instead
Leaves me broken and grateful

I’m broken and grateful
I want to be broken and grateful
I want to be broken, peaceful, faithful, grateful, grateful
I want to be broken, peaceful, faithful, grateful, grateful